White Girl in Comedy Land

Got your attention didn’t I?

This past weekend was my 23rd anniversary with The Hubzand. It took me weeks, no, months to find a comedy show at our favorite local haunt. That night just wasn’t getting any advertisement. But then I found it, and I booked our tickets. Yay!

On the very brief, not very informative advertisement, I understood we’d be watching “black” comedy. There are a few meanings for this phrase. Either way, no biggy. Funny is funny. There was the word white floating in there somewhere too, but just like the word black, it floated in and out of my line of site without a flicker.

I had bought this skin tight coral lace dress to wear that night. The Hubzand had on a black shirt and jeans. We got there early, because it’s hard to get good seats at this venue. With that comes some patience, as it usually takes awhile for the talent to get onstage. So we waited.

As we nibbled and sipped, the room  filled up with people dressed in white. White shirts. White pants. White shoes. White hats. I was feeling pretty dressed up until they got there, so it quelled my discomfort. These good looking people were dressed to the nines.

We’re close to the stage. I know from experience that they only seat you there if they think the comedians will mess with you. This, I like. After two years of improv I’m ready to take shit from just about anyone. Bring it on, I think.

The announcer guy gets on stage. He’s pretty racist, points out the fact  that there aren’t more than a handful of white people in the audience, and that everyone was supposed to be wearing white, giving me a pointed stare. He includes The Hubzand in this broad sweeping statement. Hint hint. The Hubzand isn’t caucasian. He and I snicker and look at each other knowingly. This guy isn’t exceptionally funny – he’s new from what we gather. Everyone has to learn somewhere. Good for him for trying.

As the night went on we come to know this was a White Party. Where everyone dresses in white. You know, except us. For black people. Not people dressed in black, or with dry humor, or with the last name of Black. I’m not trying to be racist with this comment. It was what it was. I gathered from the comedians comments I wasn’t very welcome, but *girl* I’m from the Oakland Bay Area and for all intensive purposes live just a few miles from the hood, so *this* I can deal with. I have been the odd duck out with my blonde hair and green eyes since I was 7. Why change things now?

And it’s freaking hilarious. They had some great comedians up there. Some not so great too. But from what I could see, most of them were a little put off that the dh and I were sitting near the stage. The point of putting us there was to help them when they needed a pick-me-up from their jokes. It didn’t happen. And it didn’t happen. Until it did.

That’s when Leslie Jones got on stage. This woman is a spit fire. The dh says she’s like a female Bobcat Goldthwait – but she reminded me of Pink. She made me laugh so hard my stomach hurt for two days. At one point she asked the light/sound crew in the back how much time she had left. Ten minutes they said. She looked pissed off – which is her shtick by the way. She got down into the audience and dragged her corded microphone around, ridiculing people in her wake.

You know it was my turn.

She was thisclose to my ear, screaming obscenities until I cried with laughter. One of which was a modified line from Dusk Til Dawn, I swear, something along the lines of you know when a white person goes into a black comedy club, that when the shows over they lock the doors and kill you. And yet, it was funny. Go figure.

Lot’s of prejudice going on.

What I came away with is that I’m either 1) too comfortable in my skin and that race is just a flavor, not a main dish for me. Or 2) I’m a dumb ass white girl who doesn’t know her place.

Either way, I had a great time.

As for the comedians? If they read this, I’m sorry. Didn’t mean to throw your show.


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