I am a sad little mess today. It’s been almost a month since my kitty left us and didn’t come home. A busy sad little mess, yes, having not only three manuscripts I’m critiquing and editing (Two out of three done! Woo hoo!) but we just got back from camping AND a writers workshop. Then there’s the fact that by day I’m also helping the Pacific Northwest Writers Association put their conference on. Its next week. Eeks! Oh yeah, and reading my book club book. Can’t forget that.
For a while I saw ghost mice everywhere. Camouflaged cats too.
I went for at least two walks a day looking for her after she left us, for the first two weeks. Once I saw a dead mole. I was like, SEE? My cat is ALIVE! She used to bring us baby moles and little mice and baby rabbits almost every day. It was truly disgusting but we were honored that it was us she was giving these obvious gifts of love to.
We only had her for 2 years, an old stray by nature, she had quite the sordid past when it came to owners. Suffice it to say we weren’t her first. I will never forget the day Ms. Kitty did me the honor of sleeping with me for the first time. That first night she waltzed into our bedroom, jumped onto our bed and stomped across. She was all muscle, her paws digging painfully into my organs as she crossed, finally throwing herself across my chest, and nuzzling my lips with her mouth. It took me a while to realize that she was trying to give me a human kiss. I about died I was so charmed.
And then I remembered watching her lick those dead bunnies. Ew.
She did everything in that manner, with her whole heart. She wouldn’t sit in your lap, she’d turn daintily and then fall into you, landing almost vertical, making sure she could feel your heart beat. I’d have to hold her up sometimes because she was so precariously perched, but she didn’t care. I knew she loved me with everything she had.
We have some new neighbors who are kind of dicks. Their large dog got ahold of TK when they “accidentally” let him off leash and “gently” got her in his muzzle. She was pissed, scratched him, which put an end to that attack pretty quick. There were some minor flesh wounds and we thought she was okay. But a week later, the same jerk’s little dog (they have/had 3) got out and chased my poor little Tiger. We haven’t seen her since. I’m heart broken.
She was my muse for Gods sakes. She was the one that made all the assholes in the world easier to deal with.
I hate people.
Except you. I love you. Really.
Just not my next-door neighbor. And a whole host of other assholes. But not you.
The Save the Cat Beat Sheet Workshop this past weekend was stellar. The long and short of it is that a very talented writing coach helped a handful of us massage our ideas and turn them into something that folks actually want to hear about/read/watch, using the Save the Cat technique. I brought an old manuscript idea that I thoroughly destroyed when I tried to write it. I really blew that one to hell. Thanks to our writing group I think I have a good grasp on where to go with it now. It was worth every penny. I highly recommend taking one if you ever get the chance. Only, now I’m a bit depleted. So worth it though.
Luckily I had STORM FRONT, our book club book, in my hot little hands while traveling. It is so good. I’m maybe 2 chapters from the end. I’m gonna sticky my last post that I started some comments on to the top of this blog. I’ll hold off on putting up more questions until I’ve finished. But oh man. So glad this was the first book for our Book Club of the First. Its helping me forget about the little lady disappearing.
Damn it all.
Except it isn’t helping right now.
Maybe its time for a glass of wine?